Hello, again.
I
should have updated this sooner, but every time I picked up my nook...I
just couldn't do it. However, fantastic news from this weekend. I was
getting ready to help crew a endurance trail ride with my aunt when I
looked over and saw Fifty Shades of Shite on her table. At first,
I was disgusted and called her out on it, but she explained that a
co-worker bought the books for her and she read them, disliked them, and
then said that I could have them and could mark them up however I
wanted.
However I wanted?
Thank you, gods, for the gift of my bright orange ball-point pen.
I am no longer afraid to toss it across the room as it is not my expensive piece of technology. And I have the whole series!
Goody.
A new color pen for each book.
I've already finished Chapter 4 and I'm working on 5, so the reviews will be done shortly. Hurrah.
And now, Chapter 3.
Just a warning, the punctuation does cry a lot.
We
start off the chapter with Kate, gushing over things that don't really
need to be gushed over as they aren't really that much cause for
excitement. And believe me, then way these girls do excitement, you'd
think that they were twelve or something. And then Kate gives us this
brilliant dialogue the third paragraph in, "I think that is one huge
coincidence, Ana. You don't think he was there to see you?"
No
shit, Captain Obvious, thank you for that one. Anyone with a brain
would have figured it out by now, hell, the "protagonist" thought that
at first, but of course, her "self-consciousness" made it so she
believed him when he said he visited her job only because he was "in the
area---on business." Definitely not stalking her though.
And
then this-this thing! "The richest, most elusive, most enigmatic
bachelor in Washington State just gave you his cell phone number?"
Seriously? I mean, seriously? Come on! Seriously? Sorry for repeating
that so much, especially because Twithead does enough inner dialogue
repeating, but...god. Add some more onto him to make him so great. But
even then, when I think about it, only gold-diggers and whores (my
apologies, guys, but I call it as I see it) go for men with zero lack of
politeness, kindness, and who have an extremely disgusting arrogance
who have a butt-load of money. And from what I've heard of later
chapters, it just reaffirms my gold-digger stance.
Then he's called polite in her mind, because, of course, the "stalker" does polite. I
mentioned the point about the roommate and sick last review, but it's
brought up again. I wish she would think about something else, but the
empty head space must be too daunting for her.
My
favorite part is where she finally starts to believe he might like her
and then this(!): "I hug myself with quiet glee, rocking from side to
side entertaining the possibility that he might like me."
Picture her for a moment, hugging herself, smiling, and rocking side to side. Got that?
Now put a straight-jacket on her. I think it fits quite nicely.
She's insane and that must be the only answer.
I
will give the author the benefit of the doubt and get on the editor for
that, but a responsible author reads the way they worded things and
tries to picture it in their heads. Rocking side to side generally
denotes something not right, I think the image that James wanted to
portray was twisting side to side.
That
doesn't make it any better though. She hasn't even known this guy for
24 hours. They've never had a real conversation. She's only talked to
him TWICE. What the hell, author! What is wrong with you?!
Then,
just to grate my nerves about how "ordinary" she is, we get Kate saying
another friend, Jose (add an accent over the 'e'), would do anything
for Ana and Kate wants him to take the pictures.
Now pause right here, right now.
Look at the people we have heard of.
Ana: Caucasian-European decent
Christian: Caucasian-European decent
Paul: Caucasian-European decent
Jose: Latino
Compare to Twilight
Bella: Caucasian-European decent
Edward: Caucasian-European decent
Mike Newton: Caucasian-European decent
Jacob Black: Native American
Forget
that both Paul and Mike work and are involved with the place where the
heroine works, who would you guess the romantic foil is?
The one who really cements the heroine and hero together?
Guessed it yet?
Yup. The minorities. This is BULLSHIT.
The author is probably going to make Jose do something that makes him
seem like the bad guy and then he's going to be forgiven by Ana. All I
know is that it is fucking racist bullshit to have the 'bad guy', as far
as I've read, be different. That's not to say that you can't have none
white people be the bad ones, but I've only read one character so far
that is racially different. I think Seattle/Portland area has more than
one Latino.
I can't handle the rest of this right now. And I'm only on the second page of this chapter. It'll have to be in parts.
Damn it.
For now-
Best wishes,
~Sunshine
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